Belize it or not! (These stupid puns continue!)

From Caulker it was time to head inland (where Belize's civil war is less intense). I had to pass through Belize City again, but at least I knew where I was going this time. Again, no incidents, probably due to my street smarts ;). I was off to San Ignacio, heart of the Cayo district. Because I made a short stop at the Belize Zoo (not really a zoo but a rehabilitation centre) I didn't get in until early evening. By that time I was suffering from some serious hunger pains, and as soon as I arrived I plopped myself down in a chair, turned to the guy next to me, and said emphatically, "I'm staaarving!" To which he responded, "I'm Steve. Nice to meet you too." After more politely introducing myself, we began to chat. He was a retired NY firefighter in Belize for a 2 week holiday, and wanting to see as much of the country as he could, had rented a vehicle for the whole duration of his trip. He had already signed up to do a tour of the ATM cave the next day, and seeing as how I had wanted to do it anyways, I decided to tag along.

While I normally avoid guided tours like the plague, this is something entirely different. For one, it is pretty incredible, especially if you like caving or are the slightest bit interested in the Maya . But, you really don´t have any other option, as the Belize government doesn't allow access to it independently, thereby effectively forcing people to go as a group. This is supposedly done to keep the numbers low and help preserve the sight, but I have my suspicions it's just a cash grab.

Anyway, my suspicions aside, the ATM cave, short for Actun Tunichil Muknal, is an extensive cave network that was highly sacred to the Maya, who during the classic period, used it for various religious ceremonies and rituals. As we explored the cave (an adventure in itself, as this is done by a combination of swimming, climbing and trekking) we came across many different Mayan artifacts. At first they were mostly shards of pottery, but as we went further and further in, things began to take on a more serious tone. As the foundation of their world began to crumble, the Maya became increasingly desperate to appease the gods. Not only did they go deeper into the cave but they began to practice more extreme rituals, including bloodletting and sacrifices. The apex of the tour came after 3 hours in the cave, when we came across the perfectly preserved remains of a young sacrificial victim, known as the 'crystal maiden'. Interesting, of course, but eerie. Adventure and history combined into one.

Steve and I got along so well, and I really didn't have any sort of plan (remember, I hate plans) that I decided to join him and road trip it through Belize. All I knew was that I wanted to be in the south within a week to go explore a remote island. But before that, I would just let the universe dictate my path and have some adventure. And what an adventure we had.

We left bright and very early the next morning to go see the ruins of Caracol. We specifically left early so that we would arrive at the nearby military post for the 9am military escort to the ruins. (High levels of banditry on the road has led to a daily military escort. Due to the proximity of the Guatemalan border, the Belizean authorities blame it on the Guatemalans.)

We made it to the post a little bit before 9am, only to be told by the officer in charge that it wasn't leaving until 9:30. After signing in they told us to stretch our legs for a while and come back at 9:30. Steve went off to take some photos, and after chatting with the soldiers for a few minutes, I left to go use the washroom at the store across the street. I had just walked out of the store when I saw Steve's white SUV racing frantically towards me. It was just within earshot when he leaned out of the window, and his voicing cracking with fear, yelled at me, "Nicole! Hurry up! Get inside, they left without us!" Bewildered, but clearly sensing the panic in him, I hopped in without questioning it further. Once inside though, I turned and asked him what the hell was going on. Apparently, he explained, when he arrived back at the post (around 9:15) the soldier in charge casually walked up to him and nonchalently informed him that the military escort had just left. When Steve asked if he could radio them to wait for us, he just told him to drive fast and catch up.

Immediately I thought that the story made no sense. There was no one else there at the post - who were they escorting? What was the point of a military escort if you just left the only people signed up behind? These questions were futile, as there was no one to answer them, and I had no choice but to sit back and laugh at the absurdity of the situation. My immediate concern was to calm Steve down, who was clearly scared and driving at breakneck speed through the Belizean jungle.

After about 10 minutes we spotted an army vehicle ahead of us - at this Steve sighed a huge breath of relief. As we approached it, however, it simply pulled over to the side and waved us on. Confused, we pulled up beside it and made the international hand signal for 'roll down your window'. When they began speaking, in British accents, it became clear that this wasn't our allotted military escort. When we asked if they'd seen it, they said they hadn't. I was beginning to suspect that this military escort may not exist, and decided at this point we had no other choice but to keep on going. I told Steve not to stop for anything, and that if we approached any sort of blockade ahead, to pop it in reverse and drive backwards as fast as he could. For some odd reason this didn't seem to calm him down any further.

So we drove on, pretty fast, and pretty recklessly, through some pretty awful road, sans miltary escort. And then suddenly, after about 20 minutes, there it was up ahead, the gates to the archaeological site! This time Steve gave a really big sigh of relief and we pulled into the (empty) parking lot. The funniest part of the whole experience was that 10 minutes after we parked the real military escort came driving in, at the proper time, followed by some other vehicles. To this day I still have no clue what the hell actually happened. But I do know I have very little faith in the Belizean military.